so long, suckers
First, my farewell email to the LA Times was excerpted in an LA Times article about farewell emails several months after I was laid off by the company. I made some “Superman II” references and likened Tribune/LA Times owner Sam Zell to an older version of Non, the mute Kryptonian with the bum heat vision. It was nice to get my name in the paper again, but the article had a sort of undercurrent of “gee, I’m not sure these kinds of farewell emails are a good idea.”
fire bad
Now, after relocating to New York and not finding work for several months and then deciding to volunteer some time at a non-profit bookstore that raises funds for homeless people with HIV/AIDS, I got a note from the volunteer coordinator that NPR was looking to do a video blog story about unemployed volunteers. I figured NPR was cool and, hey, you know, I might as well try to wring some kind of publicity out of my volunteering, so I volunteered to do the interview. I volunteer at the bookstore because it’s a charitable thing to do, plus the bookstore frequently hosts cool literary events featuring writers such as Jonathan Lethem and David Shields. And it’s a book store, and, well, I like books. Volunteering seemed like staying at least tangentially involved in the literary world. So after talking to one of the NPR producers for the NPR, the video crew — who turned out to just be Columbia journalism students — came and interviewed me during my shift. Here is the hatchet job.
cartoonish
I have worked in reality TV, and I have worked in journalism, so I know a certain amount of cherry picking goes into compiling and article or video. You put your trust in the producers/writer/editor’s hands. And these guys squished me like a baby bumble bee. I come off looking like some scoundrel who is dicking around the good people of the non-profit world, leaving them hanging at a moment’s notice. What the video didn’t include is that the bookstore’s volunteer program asks volunteers to agree to a three-month commitment. I have been volunteering there for about two and a half months, so if I did get a job at Barnes & Noble (a line that was basically fed to me by the interviewer and then taken out of context) in the next few weeks, I would have fulfilled my commitment. And there was another unused line where I said that if I did get a job, I would continue to volunteer, though I would probably have to rearrange my schedule (I currently volunteer on Tuesdays, but would probably have to shift to the weekends). Then, on top of that, there’s the part where the volunteer coordinator complains about us unemployed volunteers and how she doesn’t want to spend “five hours” training someone who will then only use that skill for “three hours.” Okay: one, of all the things I have been trained to do at the bookstore, none have taken more than five minutes to learn; two, the volunteer coordinator has never taught me any of these things anyway; and, three, a volunteer shift is four hours, so what is this using the skill for only three hours thing? The math doesn’t add up. Are blogs not subject to fact-checking? I thought this was NPR, not Fox 11.
off you go
Okay, so be crucified in the video itself was rough handling. But then this “Renee” woman gets in a few shots in the comments section under the video blog. She explains that, as a person who works in the non-profit world, it makes sense to her that “these folks [me] are not being welcomed as true volunteers.” “True volunteers.” I am an imposter. A poseur. A burden.
No good deed is left unpunished.
ouch
Tags: charity, elitism, manipulation, media, New York, NPR, volunteering
How you like them apples?
Love the snakebite photo. How about re-printing the farewell email from LAT?
ask and ye shall receive:
From: Crowe, Perry
Sent: Wednesday, July 23, 2008 5:01 PM
To: yyeditall; yyGuide
Subject: so long, and thanks for all the fish
Well, I feel like I just got here, and when I see all the farewell emails from 20- and 30-year veterans of The Times, I realize just how true that is. I feel like I was just getting started and then my phone rings and, bam, my position has been eliminated.
It’s sort of like in Superman II when Non rips the the light off the top of a police car and hurls it at a boy in the distance and it explodes like a motherlovin’ mortar round and a woman cries out, “He was just a boy!” and Ursa adds, “Who will never become a man!” And if you think that comparison doesn’t ring true, do a Google image search for “Non Superman” and one for “Sam Zell” and tell me Zell isn’t an older version of that evil, mute Kryptonian with the bum heat vision.
But perhaps a more apt comparison for my situation is to Superman himself; lucky enough to escape a dying planet. Maybe the “dying planet” remark was a little harsh, but it’s hard not to be at least a little bitter about the layoff. But when the bean counters call for 150 heads and the powers that be have chosen to close the section in which you work, the writing is pretty much on the wall. Maybe I didn’t play my cards right. Maybe I was dealt a losing hand. It’s a moot point now, as the end result is the same.
I ran with giants during my time here, and grew an inch or two for my trouble. And so I humbly and graciously thank you all for my time here. I learned a lot, whether in the form of words of advice from seasoned colleagues or from being crucified for misidentifying the make of a car with its lights on in the parking garage. You’re a hell of a bunch and I wish we had had more time together.
The L.A. Times is a long-lived, totemic institution in this city that is so lacking in unity and shared history. Walking the halls during my first days here, I felt a sense of awe, seeing the Times covers mounted on the walls, being part of an entity so in communion with the zeitgeist. There is so much potential here, it pains me to see the paper hobbled by economic woes and a changing market. This place deserves a lot better than what it’s getting these days, and I can only hope things improve. This city needs the Los Angeles Times.
Before I go, let me just mention a couple of my favorite things about this place. Number one, the individual bathroom on the second floor, between the hyper elevators and the Hoy offices. When things have got you down, nothing soothes the soul quite like walking into a public bathroom and locking the door behind
you. It’s enough to make anybody feel like an executive (like the sign says, “YOU own this company”). And secondly, do yourself a favor and stop by the vending machines across from the cafeteria. There’s just something joyous about a pre-packaged sandwich.
‘Til the next round up.
Perry
perry.crowe@gmail.com
P.S. I left a x-mas cactus at my desk, should anyone feel like adopting an orphan.
Perry Crowe
Associate Editor, The Guide
Los Angeles Times
202 W. First Street
Los Angeles, CA 90012
213.237.7101
perry.crowe@latimes.com
In retrospect, I should’ve been diplomatic enough not to directly admit to being bitter about the layoff. Got to dress that kinda shit up in poetics and self-deprecation before you can present it in the workplace!
You’re not a poster child for failure– you’re just too good for easy victories. It’s more like being a major league pitcher in a game of tee-ball. You need to pitch to someone capable of hitting what you’re throwing.
I’ll suck out the venom for ya” – just sayin, bro.